Couples Therapy · Oakland
Couples therapy
for Oakland.
You bought into Oakland because you wanted a real life, not a curated one. Now the rent has tripled, the schedule never quits, and the relationship that was supposed to be the easy part has gone quiet. You haven't done anything wrong. You've just stopped having the time and space to actually be together. We see this couple in Oakland every week.
Gottman Method, Emotionally Focused Therapy, attachment-based work. Explicitly LGBTQ+, ENM, and BIPOC-affirming. Secure telehealth across California.
Who we see in Oakland
Thoughtful people, over-extended.
The Oakland couples who walk in share a common pattern: too much real-world weight for the time and attention the relationship has been getting. A teacher and a nurse aligning shifts that never quite sync, a couple in their second decade rebuilding after a hard year, two parents who haven't had a real date since the second kid started school, partners who used to feel like a team and now feel like roommates.
The thing in common: too much real-world weight, not enough room for the relationship. The fights that show up in the room are almost never about the fight. They're about being the only adult who remembers when the rent is due, or carrying the emotional labor of a chosen family that has its own grief, or watching your partner disappear into a job that's eating them alive while you're supposed to be supportive about it.
We work with couples across all Oakland neighborhoods (Temescal, Rockridge, Grand Lake, Lake Merritt, West Oakland, the hills) and anywhere else in California via telehealth.
How the work goes
Structured, affirming, direct.
We start with a full intake: the story of the relationship, what's actually happening now, what each of you most wants from the work. Some couples do this together. Others start with a brief individual session each so we can hear both sides without one partner managing the other's reaction.
From there, the backbone is the Gottman Method. A structured framework with 40+ years of research behind it on what actually predicts whether couples make it. We integrate Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) to work the emotional pattern underneath the content of your fights, and narrative work when the story you've been inside of needs to get named before it can be rewritten.
If you're queer, ENM, or polyamorous, the structure of your relationship isn't what we're trying to fix. We work the actual dynamics inside it: communication, attachment, conflict, intimacy. That's the same work any couple does. If you're a BIPOC client, cultural context is clinically relevant, and we work with it directly.
Who you'd work with
The team for Oakland couples.
Christina Mathieson
Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) #115093
Founder and lead clinician. Gottman Method Level 2, with comprehensive sex therapy training. Couples work and sexual connection get held in the same room.
Full bio
Michelle Cortez
Registered Associate Marriage and Family Therapist (AMFT) #146795
Supervised by Christina Mathieson, LMFT #115093
Couples work grounded in EFT and attachment theory. Particular experience with ethical non-monogamy, queer relationships, and cultural identity work.
Full bio
Jalyse Stewart
Registered Associate Marriage and Family Therapist (AMFT) #153712
Supervised by Christina Mathieson, LMFT #115093
Trauma-informed couples work, with particular care for BIPOC couples and partners holding what hasn't been named at home yet.
Full bioFAQ
Common questions from Oakland couples.
Do you see same-sex and queer couples in Oakland?
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Yes, affirmingly. Queer and same-sex couples are part of our Oakland client base. The work follows the same evidence-based frameworks as any couples therapy. We won't expect you to teach us LGBTQ+ 101 or defend your relationship's structure. We will expect you to share your own lived experience, because every relationship is its own.
Are you experienced with non-monogamous and polyamorous couples?
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Yes. Michelle Cortez, AMFT #146795 (supervised by Christina Mathieson, LMFT #115093), particularly specializes in ethical non-monogamy. We work with structure, communication, and attachment across whatever configuration you're actually practicing: open, polyamorous, relationship anarchy, kitchen-table. The structure itself doesn't become the problem.
How long does couples therapy take?
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Most couples we see start to feel something shift within four or five sessions. Not 'we're fixed,' but 'oh, that's what's happening between us.' Real change tends to land somewhere between session 8 and 12. Affair recovery and long-standing avoidance often take longer. If nothing's moving by week six, we'll say so out loud.
Do you offer sliding scale or take insurance?
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We have sliding scale spots that vary by therapist and availability, and we're in-network with Lyra (employer-sponsored). Most PPO plans cover a portion of our fee through out-of-network benefits, and we provide the superbill. Mention cost during your free consult and we'll talk through what's actually possible.
Is couples therapy effective over telehealth?
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Yes. The research is now solid that telehealth couples work matches in-person outcomes for most presentations. For Oakland couples, video also removes the logistical friction (childcare, traffic, finding the same 90-minute window) that often kept therapy from happening at all.
References & further reading
- Gottman Method — research overview — The Gottman Institute
- Brené Brown on Empathy (RSA Short) — Brené Brown / RSA
- Brené Brown on Blame (RSA Short) — Brené Brown / RSA
- Come Together — Emily Nagoski, PhD — Emily Nagoski, PhD
Ready to talk it through?
Free 15-minute call. Secure telehealth, no bridge crossing required, therapist-matched to what you're actually working on.
Book a Free Consult